Monday, March 28, 2011

STRICTLY FOR GUYS!!! Guide to a Successful Relationship (on a daily basis)

My purpose is to help men with their heterosexual relationships. To lengthen, nurture, most especially strengthen the bonds between the male and female connection. To understand the woman for what she is, what she wants, what she needs. To be the greatest boyfriend if not the last boyfriend she will ever have.
I have learned all these things not just from my experiences but from others as well. I will impart this knowledge to those who want to make their relationship work. This knowledge shall not be used as a weapon, but as a guide to make this world a better place. For couples to last longer. For divorce to lessen. For women to be treated by men beyond his own.

For the true male, there is no greater thing than love for the opposite gender but in order for this to work, the female must also love you back. Such an affinity works both ways. As a male, we should understand how women work. It sounds offensive but there is no harm intended.

What do women really want from us guys? I'd say 80-90% of women want the same thing. The other 10-20% are either mentally ill, no regard for living, or just plain stupid. I used the term women for several reasons. Women are mature enough to understand the basic principles of a relationship. Women are as they themselves believe, are emotionally strong and stable but they are not. Most of all, women have, as much as emotional needs, intimate physical needs that must be nurtured and must be attended to most of the time if not all the time.


                           As a man, we should know at least 80% of the time how the woman psyche works. They have certain needs at certain times. Day, night, near, far, eating, sleeping, sometimes when she's angry, most of the time when she's sad. A man should be attentive, aware, and a little bit alert to certain tells, and to succeed, a man must get it right 60-80% of the time depending on the woman's feeling towards the man.

During the day, your duty as a man would include waking up before your woman. Why so? It most definitely is so, especially when you are still getting started with your relationship. Women want their man doing something for them even if it's still early in the morning. They find it very enticing to know that their man is thinking about them during the start of the day. Whether it's cooking breakfast, brunch, or just letting your hand graze over her arm. They feel loved and emotionally secured when this is done. For those who are still starting out, this act will be a big plus since this will start of her day with the sun smiling at her.

Throughout the day, be available to your woman as much as possible. Although they might not show it, they want to spend time with you even in the absence of words. Availability is a critical part in making a relationship work, especially for a guy. Guys, when we plan on playing our favorite video game and it just isn't there, doesn't that almost make you mad? This is the same for a woman more or less. Although she might not say how disappointed she is on not being able to make it for a party on a certain night, believe me, she is. This would often time come up in one of your future arguments because most women tend to record several mishaps but that's another topic.

When eating, never be greedy. Never ever lose focus on your woman especially when you are still early in your relationship. Even if you are starving to death. There is no excuse even if you say that you haven't eaten all day. If possible, try to share your food. Believe me, it works both ways. It's a win win situation. You get to taste her food and before you know it you're in an interesting conversation. Some women may find men who eat like they're dying, cute.  Although some might find it cute, the "some" is just 15-20% of women. The only key is to never lose your composure. This will make your woman feel very important because you are showing so much interest in her. For the one's who are in a relationship for quite some time, this area would be an exception although it never hurts to do a little of this here and there.

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day? Not in a relationship it's not. In a relationship, dinner is the most important meal of the day. Actually, it's not the meal that's important. It's the time of the day. It is where you set the tone for her sleep. To make her feel wonderful and make her feel loved before she hits the hay. In a long day, the woman requires someone to say "you're so beautiful" and coming from you, that would mean the world to her. Dinner time is where she sums up the day. This is where she talks about how her day went, what happened at work, how exhausted she is. Guys, be careful with your words. This is one of the many times where she becomes sensitive in what you say. It might be because of something bad happening on that day, exhaustion, or stress, we never know. How will you know if you are using the right words? You don't, just do your best to be on her side and be logical and helpful at the same time and in my opinion, this is the hardest part to handle in a heterosexual relationship.

Example
Woman: My boss at work really hated my presentation, I don't know what I did wrong.


Response: I'm sure you did great, maybe he just had a bad day. I can help you next time if you want.
(it doesn't matter if you help her or not, it's the thought that counts)


Also, to add to the difficulty, the sense of touch is limited to holding hands depending on the sitting arrangement.


A little tip here. It would really help if you took care of dinner. Cooking is preferable but take out would be just fine.

Of course it doesn't end there. Such conversations from dinner shall be carried on to bed. Here it becomes easier. The bed is your friend. It is easier since in bed, the distance between you and your woman lessens. You can apply touch and that makes the woman relaxed and calm. This is key to making the woman feel great in the morning. Hug her, kiss her, let her know you are there for her no matter what. If everything would be done correctly, this offers a sense of security for the woman. Makes the woman feel lucky and realizes how important she is to you and thus, you are to her.

A lot will be going on in a woman's mind before she sleeps, except of course if she is too tired. Most of these thoughts still remain a mystery for us men but this is the time when she thinks about your future. Usually over thinks and suddenly asks questions followed by more questions and fortunately enough, could very seldom end up messy. Don't worry though, these questions are easy to handle. Just don't forget to say those sweet things, how much you love her and stuff.

That's it, one perfect day down. Hopefully more days to go. Constant effort isn't really a big deal if you love what you're doing. Surely, it's not advisable to do the same things over and over everyday. Change it up a bit. Go to the zoo, observatory, drink, party, movie, concert, you know what I'm talking about. In time you will get the hang of it and this whole post would just be second nature.

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